|Posted by Miserable Retail Slave on March 5, 2012 at 9:40 PM|
I’ll admit something here. At my current place of work, one of my supervisors feels the need to play 102.5 WIOG on the radio constantly. Given that she’s a year younger than me and she’s into the whole young, party, free spirit, I guess that’s something I can expect. And naturally, every song on that station gets repeated several times a day. If I have to listen to Katy Perry sing about The One That Got Away again, I will seriously find her and give her a piece of my mind.
And then, like a backlash of fake tan and Jersey Shore quotations, I heard this song:
At first, I didn’t even think this was by LMFAO. Then again, I’m not exactly up on pop culture, especially given that pop music is there to sell records first, make music second. I also missed my chances on seeing who these guys were last semester, when they visited CMU during Homecoming Week (I think). I mean, who do those guys think they are? Sexy and I know it? I know for sure that I’m not sexy, and given my relationship status, it’s probably not gonna change anytime soon.
But then I realized something. Maybe this song is aiming for some other kind of message.
Maybe this one’s for the gay community.
Check this out:
1.) Consider the lyric “I got a passion in my pants and I ain’t afraid to show it”.
The song’s already established that there’s girls checking this guy out. Maybe he’s well dressed, and we already know he “works out”. However, he’s got this…passion. I assume it’s a bulge in his pants, if not a rock hard boner. Girls would like that, I guess, but we already know girls are eyeing him up. So why mention this? Simply put, there’s more than just girls at this club. There’s guys, too…and they might be noticing his passion as well.
2.) Consider the lyrics “When I walk in the spot (yeah), this is what I see (ok)
Everybody stops and they staring at me”
Dig deep into your childhood. Like, really deep. Preschool or Kindergarten deep. Before all of you read your porno magazines and your Cosmos, there was a children’s book called “Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?” The featured lyric above this paragraph is said in almost the exact manner as the title of this children’s book – in recorded readings of said book.
Weighing in with Wikipedia, a bear is “a LGBT slang term that refers to members of a subculture in the homosexual and bisexual male communities and to an emerging subset of LGBT communities with events, codes, and a culture-specific identity”.
3.) Consider the lyrics “And when I'm at the beach, I'm in a Speedo trying to tan my cheeks (what)”
It’s been my experience that while men find a lot in women to love physically, this kind of admiration is not reciprocated. At the risk of being too graphic, the only thing men really have besides the obvious is…well, what’s behind the obvious. Once the clothes are off, money and social status doesn’t really matter, which is a huge handicap to play with in games of attraction.
But the lights are off during sex. And even if they aren’t a woman isn’t going to be fantasizing about a male body part she can’t even see or use. So this begs the question: what’s the point of tanning your cheeks? Who’s really gonna see them when clothes come off? Certainly not girls.
And last, but not least….
4.) Do the wiggle.
Eat your heart out, Lady Gaga. Born this way? More like I’m sexy and I know it.